The Ascension Gate

Bartak speaks.

Relevant slang.

I don’t write down my thoughts, as a rule. When you’ve been hearing “carve your name on hearts, not tombstones, and especially not rocks in general” for over a hundred years, you fail to see the point of “immortal words.” That last bit was in air-quotes. I feel like I need to make that clear.

When Doc metalified my beard, I felt pretty cool. I mean, in general, I feel like I’m a pretty strong fighter, even if there’s always room for improvement. But a metal beard? For grappling??? That should have made me a bad mama jama! (Picked that up on the road from the youths; cool, right? I’m into it.)

It did not make me a bad mama jama. Instead, it made me a good poppa flop. What I’m saying is that I spent a lot of time on the ground. I guess two heads really are better than one. They got me good. It probably didn’t help that I kept “inciting attacks of opportunity.” Again, air quotes. Side note: I’m not convinced that these so-called attacks should apply to me… I don’t have a reason.

All that said, we did still kill those death dogs. Gave those dogs a real punch in the gut towards their namesake! Didn’t get to talk to any of those traveling priests though. Too bad.



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